Prince Charming
Prince Charming
Ridicule is nothing to be scared of
Don't you ever, don't you ever
Stop being dandy, showing me you're handsome



In regards to being a creative, well-dressed man (a/k/a a Dandy), there's pretty much three types of people:
1. The Clueless
2. The Cowards
3. The Clowns

Almost all men fall into the catagory of the Clueless - they don't dress well, they don't wish to dress well, and they probably couldn't dress well even if they wished to dress well. This is as it should be - most people have no sensitivity to aesthetics, no appreciation for beauty and imagination. There will always be many spear carriers and only a few chiefs. I am indifferent to these people.

The Cowards are those men who DO know the value of dressing well, but are usually too timid to be a Dandy. They are afraid of being too flamboyant. They are afraid of color. They are afraid of patterns. They sometimes hide their cowardice behind grandiose claims that they wish to be 'tasteful'-- they state that a well-dressed man should not be anachronistic or draw too much attention. These cowards are old men, even if they are 20 years old. They are fond of qouting Beau Brummell, who said “If John Bull turns around to look after you, you are not well-dressed; but either too stiff, too tight or too fashionable.” They do not seem to be aware that, in the present day, wearing a suit IS flamboyant and anachronistic. If you wear suits, you are a peacock-- you are showing off, saying fuck you to the world of denim-clad drones. In the recent BBC documentary on the bespoke tailors of Savile Row, the story is told of an American entertainment lawyer who relocated from the East Coast to Los Angeles. The lawyer was asked (it wasn't a request, it was an order) to STOP WEARING SUITS - he was making the other people in the firm look bad. He was being a distraction and was creating a hostile work environment. THAT IS WHAT THE FUTURE WILL LOOK LIKE - The tyranny of the casual. By the way, you can download that excellent Savile Row documentary here. (You didn't hear it from me.)

Then, there are the Dandy Clowns. These are the men who dress well, and are brave enough to use a palette that is not limited to blue, grey, and black.


Above, we see two men - one is strutting around in velvet and orange. That clownish man is me. I am an atheist-- if I am going to grow a set of balls and walk out the door wearing orange, I must do it in this life. I won't have another chance.

The photo was taken at a Fashion Week event - so, the other man in the photo cannot be clueless-- he knows about clothes, he's just too cowardly to dress up. He looks tasteful, which is a polite way of saying that he looks BORING.

You can be a clown and not be a dandy. To be a DANDY, you must pay attention to fabric and to fit.

You can be a dandy and not be a clown. Grey, blue and black can be nice. Should we, however, limit ourselves to that? What fun is that? Some of us prefer to live vivid, blood-splattered lives. Also, why is it that the cowards, who claim to care about being tasteful, often seem to wear clothes that DO NOT FIT - their jackets are too big, they look slouchy. I guess it shouldn't surprise us - they are too cowardly to wear clothes that REALLY fit well. That would be too 'flamboyant'. Tom Wolfe tells an anecdote about his well-tailored suits:

“I think the thing that really annoyed people was the nipped-in waist. That seemed unpatriotic, a real affectation…I could have attracted more attention to myself–I could have worn a dashiki, for example–but I wanted to be in the game. The important thing was, I wanted them to say, ‘Who in the name of God does he think he is?’”



Being colorful, flamboyant, well turned out, is a gift to the world.

Who Is A Dandy? That is a controversial question, and always good for some cocktail chatter. Almost everyone agrees that the Duke of Windsor was a dandy. Was the Duke a tasteful (i.e. cowardly) dresser, or was he brave enough to clown it up. You decide:













Personally, I'd rather hang out with a young, clownish Vivienne Stanshall, than with a coward. Neil Innes describes his first meeting with Stanshall: "He had on Billy Bunter check trousers, a Victorian frock coat, violet pince-nez glasses, and carried a euphonium. He also wore large pink rubber ears."

Vivienne's music group, the Bonzo Dog Band, had songs about shirts, songs about mustaches, and a song about trousers, which you can listen to here.